Whānau socialisation through everyday talk

This pilot study that explores what māori whānau talk about in their everyday lives and how such talk contributes to whānau socialisation.

The Whänau Talk project was a pilot study conducted to explore what Mäori whänau (families) talk about in their everyday lives and how such talk contributes to whänau socialisation. In Growing Up Mäori, Witi Ihimaera compiled views of people from a range of Mäori backgrounds (Ihimaera, 1998, p 28). In some sense the contents of Ihimaera’s book helped to illuminate the findings in the Whänau Talk project – not so much because they explore what the documented whänau talked about, but because each text shows how the socialisation of the person concerned influenced the way they grew up. Sir Paul Reeves, who went on to become Governor-General of New Zealand, said:

…I was confused about my identity. When I was a teenager the two things I worried about were my being left-handed, which made me feel embarrassed – and my dark complexion, which differentiated me from my friends. I was at Wellington College which at that time was not an easy place for Mäori. When you feel so unsure, the easiest thing to do is to deny that you are Mäori. So, I did not grow up as a Mäori. I did not have access to relatives, language and culture. Those are things I have had to work for – but love and acceptance are there, not simply for me but for my wife Beverley, and family ... I was fortunate enough that my choices, although I didn’t know it at the time, were influenced by the fact that my mother was Mäori. Ultimately, this has helped to fashion who I am. (Ihimaera, 1998, p 156)

Although this is not a taped conversation, the story is written in a conversational style, and it conveys the realities of a young man of mixed ethnic descent. Access to relatives, language and culture are important aspects of growing up as a Mäori in Sir Paul Reeves’ view. Specific circumstances meant that these were not aspects of his upbringing, yet he was ultimately able to draw on his mother’s connections, and her strong presence influenced his future. We do not know what conversations took place in the Reeves whänau, but we do know that they were to define the way the whänau lived and what they attended to in their lives. The story also makes clear that access to whänau, Te Reo Mäori and Mäori culture were withheld from Sir Paul in his growing-up years – a decision that at some stage must have resulted from tacit consent or a spoken agreement between the parents. Perhaps this was part of a consensus reached in a mixed-race marriage in a time when overt social barriers such as a colour bar were a very real part of New Zealand life (Durie, 2002; Harre, 1966; Rangihau, 1975). Since he says that the Mäori side of his family was kept from him in his earlier years, we can assume that Sir Paul was brought up with the language and culture of his father’s background, and, for whatever reason, was kept from growing up with members of his mother’s family. While the narratives in Ihimaera’s book give us glimpses into the whänau lives of a number of Mäori New Zealanders, the Whänau Talk project undertaken here considers whänau events in more detail, using everyday whänau talk to explore key questions and build a more intense and quick snapshot of whänau in action.

This report was produced for the Families Commission Blue Skies Fund by Huia Tomlins-Janke and Arohia Durie.