Coping with change or loss

Major change can be overwhelming for children and young people. Often they cannot talk about how they feel – they show it by what they do. Children may act younger, become angry or withdrawn, cry and be clingy, or have difficulty sleeping. Teenagers may become angry, and in some cases experiment with drugs and alcohol.

You can't take away the experience of the change, loss or pain. But you can help your child to cope. Let them know you understand and are ready to listen. Tell them you love them.

Helpful tips

• Talk openly with your child about the change or loss.
• Share some of your own feelings.
• Let them know it's okay to feel upset, even if others are happy.
• Give them time to talk, ask questions and share worries.
• Give them all the time and attention you can.
• Try to stick to normal family routines, as normal life helps children to feel secure
• Help them keep in touch with people, places and things that matter to them.
• Help them remember a person who has died.
• Consider letting your child's teacher or childcare worker know about a big change or loss, so they can help with support at school.
• Encourage your child to talk to their friends.